Bienvenido a Costa Rica

So I pretty much feel obligated to make a post from Costa Rica. Because that is where I am. I am staying with a host family (and I am pretty sure I am one of the only ones in the group with a good one) and actually making legitimate friends. The country is beyond beautiful, and my Spanish is definitely improving because I am getting a lot of practice with my family and locals. And I still can't get over how good of a place I am in.

Because aside from how awesome this trip is, it's also really, really, scary. I have absolutely no control over the food. We are all above the drinking age and have been taking advantage of it, which is also scary. And then there's the whole actually interacting with other people on a CONSTANT basis. And as I am sitting here, I am thinking to my self, "I really don't have a problem with any of this at all." So, to put it quite simply, I'm kind of proud of myself. I remember when I first started recovery, this trip was one of my motivators. I didn't want to come here and not be able to handle the food situation, not be able to drink because drinking is still a major fear food for me, and not be able to connect with any one.

I was a little worried that I wouldn't feel like this, because there ARE people that could be super triggering in my group, if I allowed it. If I wanted to isolate, it would not be difficult. And I COULD have avoided drinking socially. And it would be so, SO easy to restrict. But here's the kicker: I don't want to do any of this. Because I am actually enjoying being normal. Like, it's not a problem that people aren't looking at me and asking if I am okay. And that is such a major change.

And, to put icing on the cake (ho ho see what I did there?), I haven't been able to run. I irritated the cartilage under my knee cap, according to my doctor (apparently it's a really common thing in female runners because we have baby-bearing hips and narrow knees), and the only way to "fix" it is to take a break from irritating it and physical therapy. So, instead of freaking out about the amount of calories that I'm consuming and not burning, I've been doing yoga with the family dog (another story another time), walking with my host mom early in the morning, and actually just letting myself live a somewhat normal life.

This is where I am going to step back and actually pat myself on the back for how far I've come.